Not all advice is beneficial, or even applicable. You choose.
Let me start off strong here:
Do not take the advice of individuals with whom you would want to trade places with!
In fact, run a mile when you see individuals who do not walk their talk and rather go about dispensing advice. This is not about being rude, rather engaging your BS filter and absorbing what is really valid.
I have had,
- Folks guiding me on how to run a Startup when all they have been doing is spending days and nights sulking in their 9-to-5 jobs
- Folks talking about relationships when their own houses are in disarray!
- Individuals lecturing about investments and Financial IQs when, under the pretense, they are themselves a paycheck away from stress!
- Office colleagues talking about trust, when in fact they wouldn’t think twice about looking over anyone’s shoulder or ask a hundred sources instead of confronting
- People lecturing about diets and fitness when their pot bellies and ‘oh-i climbed-10 steps- i am exhausted’ bodies suggest otherwise
- Individuals talking about manners, when they wouldn’t even hold the door open or give their seat up for the needy
- Individuals lecturing about not breaking rule and then greasing the palms of traffic policemen to have their way!
- Seniors talking about meritocracy and then being sycophants to heir bosses for that promotion or raise
- Anti-littering proponents who just dump their stuff out of the car window when in the country side!
- and there are so many others….!
I first thought they are being hypocrites. But then, when you think, you feel pity for them. Most of the ‘advice’ isn’t from experience, but rather from wishlists! What they couldn’t really do, they provide that as advice!
People who can, do. Others advice!
Some have your best interests at heart and some may be doing it to just gain acceptance or to show off. Either way — You choose what to follow and what not to.
So, what’s the litmus test? I would look at three things:
- How has the life of the person been who is offering the advice — has he followed it? What were the results?
- How sane/logical is the advice? Is it something that your intuition agrees with? Judge on merit.
- Are the assumptions and your life/events similar to the scenario where this advice will work? Are we comparing apples with apples or with oranges?
I search for individuals who walk the talk.
And yes, there are pockets of learning from everyone around us. They may or may not go around advocating or advising. They live it! The best teachers live their teachings, and inspire emulation!
You have the choice always — Choose wisely! No emotion — only good judgement!
And if you want to hand out advice, you know what to do!